A Time to Say Nothing
Pitong araw at pitong gabi silang naupo sa lupa kasama ni Job. Ngunit hindi nila ito pinagsabihan ng kahit ano sapagkat nakikita nilang hirap na hirap ito sa kanyang kalagayan.
We’ve all been there.
We’ve all stood right next to a grieving friend, fumbling for the right words to say. We’ve all stared at our phones, trying to figure out what to text our friend na nawalan ng trabaho, nagkasakit, o nawalan ng mahal sa buhay.
Our usual step? I-encourage sila to look at the “bright side.” We try to make them feel better by saying:
“I know exactly how you feel.”
“Condolence. At least they are in a better place.”
“Lilipas din ‘yan.”
But sometimes, even with the best intentions, our words still fall short. At sa halip na magbigay ng comfort, these words can make others feel worse. So how can we support a grieving friend?
Job’s friends gave a good example. When Job lost his health, wealth, and family, he was in extreme grief. Makikita sa Job 2:13 na his three friends stayed by his side. Pitong araw at pitong gabi silang naupo sa lupa kasama ni Job. Ngunit hindi nila ito pinagsabihan ng kahit ano sapagkat nakikita nilang hirap na hirap ito.
Job’s friends showed that when comforting a grieving person, we don’t need to talk too much. Sometimes, our presence in the most difficult season of their life can weigh more than any word that we can say. Makinig. Manalangin. Acknowledge their pain and allow them to grieve. Kung tutuusin, it’s more helpful to say less, like:
“I’m sorry for your loss. Do you want to tell me about it?”
“I don’t know how you feel, pero nandito ako para sa iyo.”
Just show up. Be with them and let them be. Your presence is a reassurance na hindi nila kailangan dalhin lahat ng bigat o sakit nang mag-isa. Sometimes we say it best—when we say nothing at all.
Panginoon, may You give me the right words to say to comfort the grieving. Gamitin Mo po akong instrumento in sharing Your peace and love sa mga taong nasasaktan, nagdadalamhati sa panahong ito. Thank You for helping me share the hope that I received from You. Amen.
If you have a friend who’s grieving right now, check up on them. Send a reassuring text or an invitation to grab coffee together. Speak with your presence in their time of need.